There's this girl at work that drives me nuts.

For some reason, she deems it necessary to come to work in these hot outfits and strappy heels in the middle of winter.  I don't care even if she changes to heels only after she's come to work, and I care even less that the office is obviously indoors and could be warm during the day.  Why the hell would you come to work in these dresses/skirts that you would wear in the summer, and then pair it with heels that you'd wear to go out? 

I ran into her one time while I was out, and hell, she wasn't even dressed like this outside the office.

Seriously, I'm all for dressing nicely for work, but you don't have any shoes that you can actually go outside in without changing?  Do you really go outdoors with your bare legs?  If not, then why not just wear pants in the winter?  You should only wear short skirts and no tights if it's warm enough for you to go outside without a jacket.  If your upper body needs a jacket, you shouldn't be showing your bare legs.

Cover yourself, girl!

I love watching the Olympic games.  These athletes are so dedicated - their passion moves me and makes me shudder.

I was watching figure skating last night - and these athletes have such power and confidence when they are on the ice, it's scary.

btw, Patrick Chan is sexy when he is on the ice.

Last week, I wore a white flower clip in my hair, and an older woman at work told me that in the chinese culture, wearing a white flower means there's a death in the family.

I told them no, I didn't know anything about it, and there definitely isn't a death in my family, and that I was just wearing it to be pretty.

Today, my por por passed away.

I had wanted to express this incredible loss I feel. But as it turns out, there is nothing I could do about loss. There is nothing I can actively do about the loss of my very dear grandmother.

I'm at a loss for words.

I always feel guilty about my not being as devoted a Catholic as i was born and raised to be. I, and perhaps many other people, are only desperate enough to turn to religion and God when they feel despair. For that reason I have stopped asking God for anything.

But I would pray to God for him to grant us strength and courage through this time of loss.

 

At first I was a little bit disappointed that it was 5 nights and not 7 nights.  I was so determined to be away for a week because I haven't had a vacation in so long.  But on second thought, if I went away for 7 nights I would in fact come back on the Sunday night and I wouldn't have wanted to go to work the next day because I'd be super lazy.    and when we were in Cuba, I spent almost an entire day indoors because I was so lazy and there wasn't much to do.

And in fact, the last day we were there it was raining like crazy.  It would have been horrible weather for at least 2 days.

And as it turns out, it was great because our resort (Occidental Grand Flamenco Punta Cana) was nice and our room was nice.  I think I'd rather have a really nice room for 5 nights than a crappier resort and room for 7 nights.   



i love spacious rooms with high ceiling and soft lights.



way to start the vacation by trying their awesome freshly made personalized pizzas that tastes so goddamn good!  we tried to eat three but as you can see, we can only eat ...one and a half.



but wait, their tacos are even more amazing!




beautiful beach hmmmmmmm

more beaches





besides the beach, the resort has a pretty nice pool

i love that it's so relaxing. 







People say the first vacation with a boyfriend is always the most memorable.  It should be a good indication of whether the relationship is compatible or not, and it should either make your relationship better or worse.

Throughout the trip, I asked myself whether this was going better or worse, and whether it's worse because it's not getting better.  I'm not saying I had a terrible time.  I had a good time, and it was fun, and it was definitely relaxing, and I definitely loved it.

Did I have unrealistic expectations that it was going to be the most amazing time for me, and even more so for him?  Did I expect a vacation to turn the relationship around?

I wanted it to be something special, something that would always be remembered.  Something that stands out, something that is incomparable.  And I wanted that not for this vacation, but the whole relationship. 

If I said anything, he would tell me I'm being a whiny and negative.

But I'm negative because I've come to realize this, and I realize I've always known it.

So I went back to work today and they asked me how my vacation was, I just smiled and said it was amazing.  But Aysha knew and she asked me whether this trip made it better or worse, and I didn't know how to answer.

I don't think it went worse, but I had hoped it would become better.  And because it didn't, it feels worse.

But sometimes, I do feel as if I'm the one killing the relationship.  I wonder if, despite feeling as if it's going downhill, if I said nothing, he would feel nothing.



If I could, I would go back again. 

For the sun, for the chance to be happy about it again.
 

I'm leaving!

Perfect timing too, because it's snowing sooo much outside!